Two Tween Girls in a Shopping Cart

Yesterday, I went to the supermarket. While I was there a man pushed past me his cart full of food with two girls, about 10 or 11 years old, perched precariously in the little place where you normally put a single, small child. The two girls, each holding a separate cell phone, were talking excitedly with one another and with whomever was on the other end of their respective phone conversations. They had fancy hair and clothes on and the man pushing the cart seemed placid and unperturbed.

These two girls were of the age that comes just after the cheerful chub of childhood and just before the sullen, awkward swagger of adolescence. Their hair and clothes and cell phones spoke of their adult trajectory but the way they were crammed into the cart suggested a need to feel small and childish.

After they'd gone by, I wondered about that group's dynamic. What conversation had taken place upon arriving at the store? How had these two girl convinced their father to put them in the cart and let them chatter into their phones? This guy must be a total pushover. Probably spoils these girls rotten.

From the outside, it would be easy to say that this man was spoiling his kids. They were old enough to walk by themselves. Furthermore, why would two kids that age need to carry on a conference call in a supermarket? It would be easy to look down my nose at this procession.

But I wonder what I'll be like as a father when Baby J is a tween. It's a strange age. Kids are expected to grow up quickly. Perhaps too quickly. Maybe someday I'll permit my daughter to play adult as I wheel her around in the shopping cart. Or give her a chance to try out being a grownup from the safety of her childhood haunts in some other way.

Maybe someday, in another 10 years, Baby J and I will push past you in the supermarket doing something you might think strange. But every family's different and the dynamic that emerges between family members is unique.

So screw you for judging us!